June 2008 marked the beginning of my departure from Christianity. That was when I told God I was done trusting him with this most precious desire of my heart, or anything else for that matter. I did keep going to church for the next couple of months more so out of habit than anything else….
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#14. A Heart’s Final Case for Not Trusting God
God can’t be trusted. He may exist, but he certainly can’t be trusted. That was my new conclusion. If I couldn’t trust God with the most precious desire of my heart, what else couldn’t I trust him for? What else had I been wrong about that I had believed my entire life? Questions like this…
#13. Did I Believe God Was Real?
Either God was real or he wasn’t. There was no way around it. My own logic had backed me into a corner and demanded an answer. Did I believe the God I had grown up believing in was actually real? Did I believe the God I had spent my whole life trying to get to…
#12. A Real Angry Blog Post
Anger. Not just any kind. Anger towards the Almighty God himself. Now that is one thing I know a little bit about and is actually a huge part of my story. To clarify though, I’m not talking about disappointment or frustration. I’m not talking about deep sadness or even heartbreak. I’m talking about capital-A ANGER….
#11. The Aftermath
Nearly 26 years of devotion to God now suddenly seemed like the biggest waste of time imaginable. God is not a God I can trust. Yes, that does seem to explain how I ended up in this mess. The more I considered those words, the more they made sense. The unraveling process began right then…
#10. “God Can’t Be Trusted”
It’s like I was playing a game of roulette. I boldly came to the table and I held nothing back. I went all-in with everything I had left. Not out of arrogance or pride, but out of complete trust and confidence in who I thought God was. I bet everything my heart had on red–the…
#9. How One Prayer Request Unraveled My Faith
OK guys. This is where my story really gets rolling. Let me get right down to it. Up until 2008 God and I appeared to have had a really good thing going. I had happily devoted so much of my life to him and to my Christian faith. It all just seemed like it was a…
#8. The One Question I Can’t Help But Ask
There was a time in my life when Christianity came so naturally to me. Most of it made sense and what didn’t, didn’t really bother me much. Me and the whole God/Christian thing appeared to be a perfect match. But that feels like ages ago compared to where I am right now. I’ll tell you…
#7. More On That Damn Equation
Good Behavior In = Blessings Out It was this damn equation that let me down. My beautiful, beloved, predictable equation had failed me miserably in 2008 (more on this to come). The anger and betrayal left behind in my heart as a result is what completely unraveled me…and my belief in a good God.  Tragically,…
#6. A Faith That Betrays
My faith was a set-up for betrayal. It strung me along for years before turning on me. Growing up, everything I thought I knew about the Christian faith was adding up to one big, beautiful input-output equation. It was all cause and effect. It all made so much sense. Good behavior gets rewarded. Bad behavior gets punished….